Getting married is all about the happy couple. But when you’re a parent, it’s also a celebration of your family. While your child shouldn’t steal the spotlight, they should be included in the big day. After all, this is a very exciting time for them too.
Besides, finding time as a mom is hard enough at the best of times. When you’re child is actively engaged with the wedding plans, the entire process will become a lot less stressful for you. So how can you include your child in the wedding preparation without missing out on the things you want on the big day? Here’s all you need to know.
Give Them A Job On The Day
Perhaps the easiest way to get a child excited about the big day is to give them an age-appropriate role. Whether they are the flower girl, page boy, or bridesmaid, you should make a big deal of it. They’ll soon start using it as a point of conversation whenever the topic of your wedding crops up. In turn, their sense of importance and being a grown-up should see telling results.
In addition to their ‘responsibilities’ during the planning process, you can give them a small gift on the morning of the big day. Likewise, continued praise of their help as mom’s/dad’s little helper will have a positive impact. Reminding them that their outfit or other items are only for the special people is another option. All three of you could also wear or do something that unites you as one.
Let Them Participate In Pre-Wedding Decisions
There’s a lot of admin to do during the wedding preparations, and children can’t be involved in every aspect. Nonetheless, some issues can be left to them to make the final say. Sending a save the date postcard to all guests is vital. Thanks to the quality of designs and templates on offer, you can create a shortlist before letting your child pick the winner that gets sent off.
They can also pick out some of the smaller items on the big day, with your guidance, such as the guestbook cover. Depending on their age, arts and crafts assignments can be used to increase the excitement. Their work might not take center stage of the ceremony, but could be used in the morning as you prepare together. Once again, making them feel valued is key.
Bring Them To The Cake Tasting
If there’s only one activity that is sure to get kids licking their lips during the wedding plans, it’s the cake tasting. The design of the cake will be your decision. But you can still ask your child for their opinion to encourage the idea that their views are valued. However, it’s the tasting that they are really there for. In truth, most kids will be more than happy with the situation.
The baker is likely to present a variety of options. If your child picks one that you are not particularly keen about, you could ask for this flavor to be used in just one tier. Or you could create a secondary small cake for the kids. After all, youngsters have different tastes to adults. If some of your guests will bring their children, this can be a great way to keep them all happy too.
Invest In Child-Friendly Entertainment
On a similar note to finding child-friendly cake, you can think about the entertainment. Sitting through the ceremony, speeches, and meal can be long and tiring for the youngsters. Therefore, setting aside a small play area could be a great way to be the ideal solution. This will increase their enjoyment while leaving you free to focus on the magical moments.
Your child can be the unofficial organizer. Ask for their opinion on toys, films, or video games that can be included. This is a very smart move for your planning, and also gives your child an extra source of excitement. When thinking about your wedding entertainment, family-friendly solutions are often the best option. Get this right, and all kids (including yours) will love it.
Write Them Into The Vows
As already stated, a wedding is slightly different when you’re a parent. It isn’t only about the unity of two lovers, it’s about the unity of the entire family. Your child is a central part of this sentiment, which is why writing vows that include your child is a very touching way to include them. The surprise of hearing their own name can be quite exciting for a youngster. And your spouse.
This is a moment that they can look back on and cherish in later life, especially if you have a videographer for the big day. Actually having your child at the altar with you can further cement the idea that the wedding is about all of you. And it is. So, for the sake of yourselves as a bride and groom, in addition to your child’s interest, this is a great move.
Let Them Perform
Not all kids are confident in public. Therefore, you should never force them into making a speech, writing a poem, or doing a dance. However, these cute forms of entertainment can add a special ingredient to the late afternoon. If your child is naturally creative and confident, this is an ideal route to encourage participation. Practice for the big day should keep them occupied and excited too.
If performing isn’t quite for them, they can be involved in other ways. Let them take photos with a disposable camera or a DSLR for another perspective of the big day. The best thing about this option is that their work can be used to create photos or canvas art for the home. This will support the idea that this was their big day too for many years to come, which can only be a good thing
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Give Them A Sneak Peek Of The Event
Kids love to feel that they are included in special moments, especially when they get to see things before other people. When your wedding planner, tailor, or other services send plans through, involve your child. The newlyweds-to-be can take the first look without telling. Still, making a big deal when looking through photos of the wedding dress, decorations, or other features is key.
Remind them that it’s a secret, and the information will feel very exciting. And this buzz will naturally translate to make the wedding day take on an extra fascination in their mind. Given how long the wedding planning process can last, this may be one of the biggest breakthroughs. Pay special attention to the previews of items directly affecting them, such as their suit or dress.
Have A First Family Dance
The first dance is a key moment of your big day. As a newlywed couple, you should have the opportunity to dance alone to your special song. However, there is still an opportunity to involve your child by introducing them to the dance floor for the second verse. This is before inviting the guests onto the dance floor for the big party celebration. It’ll also get the party up and running.
The approach will essentially break your first dance into three stages. There will be the first verse and chorus for the happy couple, the second verse for the family, and the final chorus for everyone. Of course, this may change depending on the song choice (kids can help here too if you have a shortlist) but the basic idea is there. It also removes some of your potential stress. Perfect.
Involve Them In The ‘Honeymoon’
Every newlywed couple deserves to have a little time to celebrate their love alone. However, it might not be a bad idea to arrange a second vacation that includes your child. This can be done by trading the two-week trip for a 10-day adventure, followed by a long family weekend break shortly after. Or you could ask your parents to join you on holiday and babysit on some of the days.
The first idea is probably a better option. Kids will be particularly excited if this shorter break is built with their interests in mind. Visiting SeaWorld or Disney World, for example, will give them another reason to countdown to the wedding. Each day closer to the wedding is another step closer to seeing Mickey and co. If that doesn’t breed a spike in excitement, what will?
The Final Word
Finding the right balance between a wedding day that celebrates your love as a couple as well as your love as a family can seem tough. In reality, though, getting this right can be fairly easy if you have the right tricks up your sleeve. Ultimately, you need to make a conscious effort to include your child and follow it up with the enthusiasm that will get them excited.
Master this challenge, and your wedding plans will go a lot smoother. Most importantly, it’ll be the dream day for everyone!
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