Having difficult conversations is always hard, but it will not be a sensitive topic if it doesn’t come at a cost, will it? Although sensitive topics are usually insightful, they’re generally contentious, so it is common sense for many people to avoid them. But how do we improve as a society if we don’t ask difficult questions and discuss potentially offensive topics?
Therein lies the dilemma; how do we discuss these potentially offensive but necessary topics without offending others? All of us have been in such situations. We have had to start a conversation that we would rather avoid. And we have also been at the receiving end of difficult conversations.
Sensitive topics involve crucial aspects of our life like our future, income, and loss of a valued connection. Discussing these things will help us better navigate our lives and understand how we and others cope with difficult issues. Discussing delicate issues can enhance teamwork, decision-making, and productivity and strengthen relationships in our personal lives and the workplace.
But the issue is, how can this be achieved without hurting the feelings of other people? One of the ways to go about this is by using civil discourse. Right now, you’re probably asking, what is civil discourse? How can one engage in it? Civil discourse refers to a conversation whereby the parties involved are free to air their views. It is a conversation aimed at mutual understanding using polite behavior. Civil discourse involves active listening, respect for differing opinions, and polite exchanges.
Apart from civil discourse, there are other ways to engage in difficult conversations without offending others. Difficult conversations can result in discomfort and might be awkward, but we shouldn’t run away from them. Avoiding difficult conversations helps no one, and delaying them doesn’t solve any problem. Most times, the anticipation of the discussion is more uncomfortable than the actual conversation itself.
The start of a difficult conversation is expected to be awkward. Still, once that stage has passed, the conversation becomes rich and insightful. Suppose you need help with how to discuss sensitive issues without hurting the feelings of others. In that case, the tips below, when put into practice, will help you get the best out of a difficult conversation and leave everyone feeling fulfilled.
Tips For Sensitive Conversations
Active Listening
Active listening is a crucial component of civil discourse and an important conversational skill. Listening is the most effective way to engage in fruitful discussions with other people, no matter how difficult the conversation is. When you allow the speaker to speak their mind without interruption, the speaker will feel valued and heard and more open to sharing more with you.
Instead of worrying about the right response to give to the speaker, it is better to listen and understand the speaker’s viewpoints and perspectives. Many people erroneously believe that if you listen to the speaker without interruption, you agree with what the person says. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Listening to the speaker doesn’t mean that you agree with the person. It means that you care about the person to understand their perspective. You can only contribute meaningfully to a conversation if you grasp the viewpoints and opinions of the speaker. So, to avoid misunderstanding, you should ask pertinent questions to clear up any line of thought you need clarification on. Also, positive facial expressions are part of active listening skills and contribute to a rich conversation.
Break Unpleasant News Gradually
It is never an easy job to be the bearer of bad news; however, somebody has got to deliver the news no matter how terrible it is. Therefore it is better to learn how to disclose undesirable news. The first thing to remember is that unwelcome news is never to be blurted out unexpectedly, especially if there is no background to the story.
If you are tasked with delivering bad news, creating a space where the bad news is anticipated is considered a wise approach. This way, the receiver can better manage their response to it.
Be Comfortable With Silence
Difficult conversations can often be awkward, resulting in periodic silence during talks. It will help if you don’t interrupt the silence. It is hard enough for one to be in a difficult conversation. The cover of silence helps the person to understand their flow of thoughts better and do their thinking, so it is important to respect the silence.
If you feel like the silence is too long, you can reassure them by telling them to take their time and that you are not in a hurry. Also, saying something like, let’s all give each other time to think, also helps. Many people are uncomfortable with loud or awkward silences, but it should not make you ruin a conversation.
Final Thoughts
Having sensitive discussions is always challenging for everyone. However, it helps if you know the skills necessary to navigate sensitive or difficult conversations. Using civil discourse techniques and ending the conversation positively will turn a very sensitive discussion into a fulfilling one.
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