Tips for Preparing an Older Sibling for a New Baby

Micah isn’t even two yet, so he couldn’t really understand the concept of a baby and how it would change our family, but there are ways to help any child be ready for a new baby joining the family, and to make the transition smoother after baby is born.

Baby Doll – For Micah, being so young, I think the best thing we did was get him a baby doll. He quickly learned the word baby and could easily see it was like him just smaller by pointing out it’s eyes and fingers and so on. His doll takes quite the beating because it is just a doll, but it has helped a lot.

Talk About It – We talked a lot about the coming baby, the baby in mommy’s belly, and the little sister he would have soon. Plus the people at church talked about the new baby and the growing belly was unavoidable.

Prepare – Let the older child help decorate the nursery, put away the clothes, open the presents, brainstorm name options, and more. Involve them in every step!

OB appointments – for children that can handle sitting at the doctor’s office, bring them along to see the baby’s ultrasound or hear the heartbeat to make it more real.

Other Babies – Let the older sibling hang out with other people’s babies. A friend of ours had a baby this spring, so Micah had a few (very closely supervised) chances to see that wiggly baby. He was scared of it at first, but it was a good chance for us to tell him that we would have one like it soon, and that it wasn’t just a doll so he needed to be gentle.

At Birth – Introduce the older sibling to the new baby soon after birth. Micah came to visit very briefly in the hospital the night Emersyn was born, that way he could see where mommy was, meet the new baby, and feel involved. The next day he came to visit again and immediately looked in the same spot for baby and wondered where she was since the bassinet had moved. He did get a little worried that my tummy had shrunk drastically, but seemed to understand when I told him it was because baby was out.

Let Them Help – An older sibling’s help might actually slow things down rather than help, but it’s important for them to feel involved. Micah “helps” change diapers by getting out wipes (and stealing the diaper, then wanting to change his diaper too). Micah loves sharing EVERYTHING with new baby, so we have to keep a close eye on him with her at all times, but it’s heart-warming to see him loving on his sister. We also encourage him to give her kisses, tell her goodnight, help us by throwing away diapers or bringing me items, and so on. He’s still so young himself that we have to monitor him closely because he doesn’t know better than to feed her food or pick her up etc, but he loves her dearly. He even worries when he doesn’t know where she is and looks around the house for her!

One-on-One Time – Don’t let the older sibling get left out in the chaos of new baby. Keep special one-on-one times, like reading before bed, playing together, or other routine times you shared before baby. Remind the older sibling they are still important and you still want to spend time with them.